I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
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