ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize
