Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
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