Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Randomize