just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
