Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize