You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize