I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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