No subtext here. People are naked.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."