She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms