The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?