if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Randomize