Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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