Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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