i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize