Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.