There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize