is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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