it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
she told me i tasted like america
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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