from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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