There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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