Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(604): View more from British Columbia

I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.

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(604): I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks. http://tfl.nu/kxma

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(703): View more from Virginia

At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here

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(703): At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here http://tfl.nu/z46s

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(216): View more from Ohio

when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account

(1-216): View more from Ohio

damn...impressive bar tab

(216): View more from Ohio

no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer

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(216): when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account (1-216): damn...impressive bar tab (216): no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer http://tfl.nu/hyvf

Replies (13) Good night (1145) Bad night (1851)
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?

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(570): is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs? http://tfl.nu/dpsw

Replies (21) Good night (4155) Bad night (705) Order T-Shirt
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(305): View more from Florida

Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...

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(305): Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid... http://tfl.nu/f15q

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(555): View more from

Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.

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(555): Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style. http://tfl.nu/a25z

Replies (30) Good night (2005) Bad night (3887) Order T-Shirt
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(317): View more from Indiana

The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic

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(317): The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic http://tfl.nu/lvdi

Replies (17) Good night (15691) Bad night (1089)
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(512): View more from Texas

I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.

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(512): I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me. http://tfl.nu/y2u9

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.

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(484): I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night. http://tfl.nu/i8lc

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(+45): View more from Denmark

Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.

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(+45): Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired. http://tfl.nu/rbaa

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(505): View more from New Mexico

Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.

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(505): Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait. http://tfl.nu/lp7a

Replies (6) Good night (2521) Bad night (559) Order T-Shirt
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(920): View more from Wisconsin

I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.

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(920): I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation. http://tfl.nu/1i3x

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(425): View more from Washington

Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?

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(425): Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism? http://tfl.nu/s1hj

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(442): View more from California

Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.

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(442): Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always. http://tfl.nu/0ay8

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(315): View more from New York

Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack

(1-315): View more from New York

This is why I love you...

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(315): Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack (1-315): This is why I love you... http://tfl.nu/jq03

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