Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?