I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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