It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
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