his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
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