Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(561): View more from Florida

Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!

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(561): Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir! http://tfl.nu/b2ab

Replies (18) Good night (2631) Bad night (508)
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(404): View more from Georgia

Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.

(1-404): View more from Georgia

Two?

(404): View more from Georgia

Two.

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(404): Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs. (1-404): Two? (404): Two. http://tfl.nu/opzf

Replies (260) Good night (3951) Bad night (78172)
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(479): View more from Arkansas

Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...

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(479): Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school... http://tfl.nu/5amt

Replies (23) Good night (4774) Bad night (511)
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(970): View more from Colorado

I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.

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(970): I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious. http://tfl.nu/cwzo

Replies (21) Good night (608) Bad night (4434) Order T-Shirt
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(818): View more from California

so... thinking about masturbating finally

(661): View more from California

taking the losers way out I see

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(818): so... thinking about masturbating finally (661): taking the losers way out I see http://tfl.nu/lnxg

Replies (14) Good night (520) Bad night (2657)
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(908): View more from New Jersey

i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back

(914): View more from New York

that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart

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(908): i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back (914): that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart http://tfl.nu/d09e

Replies (102) Good night (1525) Bad night (5357)
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(716): View more from New York

kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year

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(716): kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year http://tfl.nu/qbpm

Replies (20) Good night (5121) Bad night (989) Order T-Shirt
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(609): View more from New Jersey

it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores

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(609): it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores http://tfl.nu/lmvr

Replies (10) Good night (3210) Bad night (707) Order T-Shirt
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(678): View more from Georgia

As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.

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(678): As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off. http://tfl.nu/2oau

Replies (3) Good night (2699) Bad night (601) Order T-Shirt
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(503): View more from Oregon

We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake

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(503): We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake http://tfl.nu/m3xg

Replies (13) Good night (3227) Bad night (677) Order T-Shirt
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(360): View more from Washington

It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.

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(360): It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that. http://tfl.nu/4zse

Replies (14) Good night (2753) Bad night (1541) Order T-Shirt
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(567): View more from Ohio

For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.

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(567): For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts. http://tfl.nu/swyw

Replies (10) Good night (1885) Bad night (713) Order T-Shirt
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(920): View more from Wisconsin

Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots

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(920): Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots http://tfl.nu/w4ec

Replies (7) Good night (1144) Bad night (378) Order T-Shirt
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(518): View more from New York

Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.

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(518): Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try. http://tfl.nu/4xiu

Replies (2) Good night (639) Bad night (231) Order T-Shirt
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(928): View more from Arizona

i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.

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(928): i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice. http://tfl.nu/k07n

Replies (1) Good night (433) Bad night (231)

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