You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.