i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
