bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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