dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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