Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I want to walk on stilts...naked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
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