It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Randomize