Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I cockslap morals
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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