This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Randomize
