People with herpes should wear stickers.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
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