Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
