if i died would you start the facebook group?
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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