And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize
