well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
