no, he came in my armpit
He uses pillows to masturbate.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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