'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize