Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
