We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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