Pappa wants mamma naked
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Randomize
