White coat. Heels.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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