Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
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