wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.