so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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