I'm gonna have a badass scar
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize