All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
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