no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
