8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize